detail therapy

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Thursday 14 January 2010

death wish
















I've always wanted to live a VERY long life, preferably long enough to see out the end of this Solar System, to travel the galaxy in my own spaceship, to never stop learning and making connections.

I'd still be pissed-off if you told me for certain I wasn't going to get this wish.

I'm such a material boy, though...

Seeing this new concept gravestone from Ivanka, a Hungarian design couple, has helped me come to terms with my death. In fact, I'm now going to be pissed-off that I won't get to see my VERY cool grave slowly weather and gather moss.

Hmm... suddenly that shallow water seems a very apt memorial for me.

Tuesday 12 January 2010

beyond deep throat to peristalsis

A man can dream, can't he?

reading the city














After some years away, work brought me back to the city.

For all my mixed emotions on returning, my eyes gorged themselves on the cityscape.

I realised that I was like one re-reading a favourite novel, scanning familiar pages for landmarks recalled, and celebrating at once both my recall and the city's persistence. My eyes were frantic for detail. I couldn't open them wide enough.

Every street was a page indented by paragraphed turnings into side-streets. Parades of shops like stanzas in poetry.

The city was a vast Victorian novel with a cast of individually realised architectural characters all interconnected, the story arcs and plot twists mapped by these roads and junctions. Looking along just one street I could read the melodrama of the ten years I had been away: the relative fortunes of shops I remembered, the small grief where a business had disappeared, the fading of once upstart new architecture into a slightly shabby middle-age, the shock slide of some buildings into a neglected architectural dementia.

The city I loved had continued without me. It was naturally, and rightfully, oblivious to me. Others had far more claim to ownership. And yet... and yet I carried within me my personal version of this town, my own narrative of these streets.

faith = hope + trust

"Hope" and "Trust", by definition, depend on the real likelihood of being let down, of there being no basis for either.

The meaning of these words imply the possibility that the hoped-for or trusted-in may not be the case.

These are compromised words, compromised states.

As a society we elevate them to the highest echelon of honour - to hope or to trust is to exhibit the noblest behaviour.

We venerate fallibility. We celebrate the attempt that could fail.

What does that say about us?